Topic: Hello, Manila! (or, The Firmware Update Customer Service Blues)

[Mouldingo]

Nakakahiya

There's nothing quite as frustrating as attempting to perform some routine home theater maintenance function and after calling tech support, to find oneself in some far off land...

... speaking to a dolt.

After thoroughly enjoying the Blu-ray Disc set of Lost: Season 3, I attempted to view the final disc, only to have it lock up on me after multiple attempts.

"Firmware Upgrade" came to mind.

That normally solves technical or synchronicity problems between software publishers and hardware manufacturers. Normally, I've found that the problems arise on the software authoring side, with details simply slipping through the cracks, and with the resultant problem then turned over to the hardware folks with the simple request of "fix it for us." After all, it would be too easy to try to play sample discs on various pieces of equipment before you press 50,000 units.

While the battle between HD and BD was raging heavily, there was little that the hardware folks could do but bow, smiles and give a hearty "Great, we'd love to fix your screw-ups!"

With the war seemingly starting to wind down, the hardware folks may be a little less pleased to continue fixing software mistakes, and we may begin to see fewer firmware upgrades and more software disc recalls.

I visited the Panasonic web site, and found that there was an upgrade available.

Going to the upgrade page I also found that their website isn't Mac friendly - and I'm a Mac guy. This has been getting to be a far lesser problem than in years past, and I was frankly surprised not to see downloads for both Mac as well as the other thing.

Toshiba had always been very good about sending out discs for those in need, and making the rash assumption that Panasonic would be similarly consumer friendly, I made my call.

Beginning with an automated operator, who couldn't quite understand what I wanted, I finally did make my way to tech support.

Now let me get his out there as clearly as possible.

The Philippines has a great history and is filled with beautiful and intelligent people, inclusive of some personal friends.

But it seems that every time that I end up being transferred to some foreign land, be it Manila or Bangladesh, things just don't go well. And I do not speak in some strange backwoods dialect.

Somehow I always seem to get the idiots. Or possibly it's just that they're being paid seven cents an hour, and these are the only people willing to work for such low wages.

Anyway, that's how I met "Bill".

I explained as concisely and simply as possible what my problem was and what I needed - and that I was running a Mac.

A fact that will become increasingly important as minutes grind by.

I requested an upgrade disc, and was asked the usual questions.

"Where did you get the player?"

"What is the serial number?"

"When did you make the purchase?"

This last query seemed to be important to him as I was advised that I could be out of warranty.

I explained that firmware upgrades were generally not considered to be warranty issues.

Once we got past the question and answers, I was told that I would have to download the file, and was directed to a Japanese Panasonic site that would solve my problems.

I reminded my new friend, Bill, that I had already been to the domestic U.S. site, and that it was duly noted that the site was NOT MAC FRIENDLY.

It was excruciating.

Letter by letter. "H... T... T... P..."

"Okay," he replied. "I walk you through it."

Now you've got to understand. I know what sprocket holes look like, but I am not a computer whiz. I give Bill the benefit of the doubt.

The link doesn't work.

We try another, and I'm told to download the file, after which we'll uncompress it by simply double-clicking.

Now, not being a whiz doesn't mean that I'm totally computer illiterate. I see the file labeled as an .exe, and I know what that is.

Macs don't like .exe files.

So just to be sure that we're all on the same page, I remind him that I'm on a Mac.

Bill, my bud, tells me to download it anyway.

Fifteen minutes into the download, the file shows up on my desktop. As an .exe file.

Was I expecting something else?

Bill tells me that we're good.

"Just double click on it...," he advises.

"Okay, I'll try it, but it's an .exe file, and I'm on a Mac," I remind him.

"Just double click and it will open."

So I double click.

The next thing that I know Microsoft Excel is opening, and trying to figure out what to do with a Panasonic .exe file.

It's not good.

Bill assumes that all is well. "Did it open?"

"No. It won't open. Excel opened."

"Did you double click it?"

"Yes, but I'm on a Mac."

"Oh, you can't do this on a Mac."

With steam coming out of my ears, I explained that I knew that it wouldn't work on a Mac, and we had been discussing that major point for the last 45 minutes. That's why I need a disc.

"Well, why don't you go get one of the other computers? Have someone do it for you. Go to a store."

I'm not going to bother friends. I'm not going to a store.

I just want an upgrade disc.

"Well, we might be able to get you one, but you're out of warranty. You have to do it online."

"How do I do it online?"

"You go to the website."

"But I'm on a Mac."

"Then it won't work."

Fearing that I'm getting further and further toward getting into an old Abbott and Costello routine or gaining a penchant for violence, I request a supervisor.

Twenty minutes on hold, I finally give up.

I call back, and after going through "Hi, I'm Julie!" or whomever, I find myself back in Manila, immediately requesting a supervisor.

Then the connection goes dead.

"If you'd like to make a call..."

Ever gluttonous for punishment, and not having had anything sharp jammed under my fingernails in days, I try again.

This time a get a lovely women who sounds American.

I explain the entire saga, but she's on the switchboard, and can only connect me.

But she's terrific. She stays with the call until I find Steve, who is somewhere around the Chesapeake in Virginia.

I Love Virginia!

After discussing the Mac situation - "Yes, we're working on that"

And Manila... "I'm so sorry," Steve offers to send me an upgrade disc.

Don't need receipts.

Don't need serial numbers.

I'm in the database.

It's not a warranty issue.

Steve is with it! He understands the problems before I even finish discussing them, and it's done.

So here's the issue.

I seldom have a problem with tech support here in the U.S.

But on almost a constant basis, things don't get accomplished once you're in the Philippines or India. I even think I've been to Iceland.

And short of finding really good people in foreign territories, this just doesn't seem to be working. It's certainly not like the old days when foreign labor was easily accessed, but I've got to believe that getting tech support from a seven year old girl chained to a phone, and fed every other day won't work either.

The American economy isn't in the best of shape at the moment.

People are losing their homes.

Children are going without proper nutrition.

Can't companies find people here, or if necessary abroad, and train them to do simple repetitive tech support functions?

The automated systems seem to work reasonably well.

Call Apple, and you're routed through to someone who can help you better than 95% of the time. When they can't, they find someone who can.

So what is Apple doing that others can't quite seem to figure out?

Had I reached Steve in Virginia rather than Bill in Manila, I would have had an easy time of it.

So, to Steve...

Thank you.

RAH

http://www.thedigitalbits.com/articles/robertharris/harris020408.html

[Clondalkin]

One thing I learned about working directly with people in the technical field in first world nations is that nobody is ashamed to say "I don't know" if they really don't, unlike us Filipinos who have the tendency to really try so hard to make whatever reply we can even without the faintest idea on the subject matter.   That kind of thinking has both merits and disadvantages.  Sometimes, we can get away with it and look smart, but more often, it can be very dangerous.

In Japan, I have been told many times by Customer Service that "they can only say what is written in their guidebook or in the manual.  If it's not in the guidebook, they don't know the answer - straight to the point."