no worries jen,
in all this quest...there is what people call nirvana...however...that is all relative.
some may choose to continue its chase, some dwell on other things. whatever your intentions are jen...your senses will somehow lead you back...perhaps in no time (and with a big bang!).
keep us abreast with your plans...within or without our leisure pursuit of nirvana! just like i said, nirvana is relative...it can come from this hobby, or something else!
i say kudos to you bro...and your valuable inputs to newbies like me!
cheers!