Feminism
Ephesians 5
"Wives submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord". ... "Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything". ... "nevertheless let everyone of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband".
I Peter 3:1, "Like wise you wives, be in subjection to your own husbands".
None of these passages teach that women are inferior in intellect, but that her feminine qualities preclude her being as well endowed for leadership. The subjection does not mean servitude. It is not the relationship of master and slave or as a maid or servant. Hers is a recognition of the husband's leadership, wisdom and tenderness. He should be as loving toward her as Christ loved the church.
At this point, there are several privileges that belong to the wife. For instance, she is to be loved like Christ loved the church as commanded in Ephesians 5:25. She is to be honored as none other in I Peter 3:7, and she is to be praised by her family, Pro. 31:28. In Titus 2:4 we read, "That (the aged women) may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed". Here is a fine list of the responsibilities of the wife. All of these are important, but let us just dwell on four of these.
"To love their husbands" is a command. Too often this is equated by men to believe it is only a sexual relationship and in the mind of some women, that is all they think they are good for. To love your husband means that you are a partner with him, working together toward a common goal. Then you can be appreciative of his actions, efforts and work in supporting the family. You will do all that you possibly can to see that they are comfortable and happy when they come home.
"To love their children", is another command. As men provide for the family financially, mothers s tay home and rear the children. This might often be considered a thankless job. This is an area in which you can excel. As he earns the living and supports the family, you take care of the children while he is gone to work and make the house comfortable by keeping it pleasant and enjoyable. Yes, children can become exasperating at times, but remember, they are children who are still developing and learning. They need that sober guiding hand of the mature mother who lets them know that they are the objects of her love and concern.
"To be obedient to their own husband" points out the closeness of the two." This is not indicating that You can't and do not have any thoughts of your own The idea is that as husband and wife work together and that you are not constantly pulling in an opposite direction. This obedience does not mean that you are a slave or an indentured servant, but rather that you are sharing a mutual goal. The harshness of the word obedient is tempered by the display of love and affection that the husband shows his wife. "To be keepers at home" is a command that indicates a divided responsibility. His job seems to be to go out and earn the living and provide for his family while she looks after the home. Even though a wife does not work outside of the home in what we call public work, she is still vital to the income of the family. Hers is a non-income producing activity, but it is still vitally important to the overall success of the family.
When God created woman, she was taken from the rib of man as is described in Genesis. She was not taken from his foot that she might be crushed underneath his heel in bitterness. Neither was she taken from his head so that she might rule over him. She was not taken from the hand so that she might continually fill the position of waiting upon him. She was taken from the rib on man that she might be by his side continually. She is to be loved and is to respond as a part of his body. Husbands and wives are a part of each other. Let me call your attention to the Old Testament in which the writer Solomon describes a worthy woman. It is Proverbs 31:10-31. These verses quite explicitly give us God's view of a wife and mother.
Proverbs 31:10-31 (King James Version)
10Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies.
11The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil.
12She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life.
13She seeketh wool, and flax, and worketh willingly with her hands.
14She is like the merchants' ships; she bringeth her food from afar.
15She riseth also while it is yet night, and giveth meat to her household, and a portion to her maidens.
16She considereth a field, and buyeth it: with the fruit of her hands she planteth a vineyard.
17She girdeth her loins with strength, and strengtheneth her arms.
18She perceiveth that her merchandise is good: her candle goeth not out by night.
19She layeth her hands to the spindle, and her hands hold the distaff.
20She stretcheth out her hand to the poor; yea, she reacheth forth her hands to the needy.
21She is not afraid of the snow for her household: for all her household are clothed with scarlet.
22She maketh herself coverings of tapestry; her clothing is silk and purple.
23Her husband is known in the gates, when he sitteth among the elders of the land.
24She maketh fine linen, and selleth it; and delivereth girdles unto the merchant.
25Strength and honour are her clothing; and she shall rejoice in time to come.
26She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness.
27She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness.
28Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her.
29Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excellest them all.
30Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised.
31Give her of the fruit of her hands; and let her own works praise her in the gates.
Genesis 3:16
"her desire shall be to man".
Eph. 5:23,
"husband is head of the wife";
I Tim. 2:11-12,
"She shall have no dominion over a man".
Now don't stop at these verses and think that the only responsibility of the husband is to be HEAD of the house. By the way, head does not mean master as in a master-slave relationship, nor does it mean a relationship like a general to a private in the army. It is more like a partnership where one is the leader, guide, director. Now consider this. Can you think of any decision that a husband should make WITHOUT consulting or considering his wife and her wishes? I cannot!
The husband is to love his wife above all other human beings. Consider Eph. 5:25 and 28; and Col. 3:19. These passages teach that the husband is to be considerate and tender. The verses in Ephesians 5 teach that the husband is to cherish his wife. This means that she is to be treated with tenderness and affection. This would mean that since love must be fed, there is to be a warm demonstrative love relationship. The husband has the responsibility of not only demonstrating his love and concern, but telling her. He should not sit in such self-absorption that he does not talk with her and communicate with her socially, mentally, verbally and physically. The husband will demonstrate his love for his wife in other ways, rather than just at the time of sexual relationship. If this is the only time that affection and consideration is shown, then a wife will get the idea that all a husband is interested in is her body and that she is merely a sex object.
I Peter 3:7, teaches that the husband is to honor his wife. She gave up her name to take yours. Honor means that you should show her respect and this involves courtesy, consideration and emotional support. Be sure that as her husband that you do not hold her up to ridicule in public by the cutting remarks that you make. She wears YOUR name and is to viewed as part of your body. She is not perfect and you are aware of this. Do not expect perfection, but as Ephesians 4:32 teaches, "forbear one another". This means to be gentle toward her. Control of temper, abstaining from physical violence and restraining a sharp tongue that makes one feel so inferior - are ways by which you can exhibit forbearance.